Attitude is everything

Attitude is everything – Change your attitude ….change your life!

     ……..by Jeff Keller

Feel successful to be successful!
Everything we achieve is based on our subconscious belief. Jeff defines success as a state of mind. For us to reach success, we need to fantasize the desired success status. Experiencing the success that we aspire for is not just day dreaming; it is a process of energizing oneself to move towards the set target.

We know that the external factors are responsible for mood. Though we can’t control the circumstances, we can always control our thoughts. Even Happiness comes through attitude and not circumstances all the time. It needs to be a continuous process. A little positive thinking doesn’t produce positive results, just like a little exercise does not make you fit.

You’re a human magnet
Let’s say that a student want’s to crack a tough entrance exam to get into her dream college to give a perfect takeoff to her career. Jeff says, “If you constantly think about your goal, then you’ll take steps to move towards the goal. This person, like a human magnet will attract all the opportunities that will move her in that direction.

The “Magic” of commitment
Until one is committed there is hesitancy. The chances to draw back always injects ineffectiveness. Efforts only fully realizes its reward after a person refuses to quit. With ordinary talent but extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable. One person with a commitment is worth more than 100 people who have only an interest.

Turn your problem into opportunities
In your tough times you can either wallow in misery or dwell on negative aspects or you can find benefits or lessons the tough time is offering. Eg. We’ve often heard people saying that she/he lost the job and was forced to start a business and that business made her/him a real big person. The things which hurt, instruct. Actually the adversity brings out our hidden potential.

Your words blaze a trail
There are some invalidated notions in our mind. For example, we’ve heard people saying, “I am bad at sales. I can never sell anything to people”. This person runs this through her/his mind on several occasions. This strengthens her/his beliefs and it’s at this stage where the rubber really meets the road. This becomes embedded in her/his mind. Nobody is forcing such person to be a sales person but the attitude acts as an excuse in many aspects of life not necessary the literal sales.

Scientist’s words are worth looking at
Years ago Kent Cullers, a scientist who headed NASA’s research for extra-terrestrial intelligence project was developing a software that searches for radio signals indicating the presence of other life forms in the universe. Sounds a little like Star Trek, doesn’t it? But make no mistake about it, this is a serious technical scientific research. And yet, our friend Cullers has a physical challenge to contend with. He refers to his condition as ‘a trivial affliction’ and ‘just barely an inconvenience’. What is his physical challenge?  A touch of arthritis? Frequent migraine headaches?
Kent cullers is blind! That’s right. He is blind. But using these words…’ a trivial affliction’ he is empowering himself to achieve great things.

To Tell….or not to tell
These positive words are to be discussed with myself or should I share them with friends?
Jeff says one needs to decide for oneself, whether to share the positive words with the society or not but never discuss your goals with negative people. All they do is argue and point out all the reasons why you won’t be successful. Negativity affects.
In the book, Zig ziglar included a statement that he reduces his weight of 165 pounds. This was 10 months before the book went to the press, where 25000 copies were to be printed. Now, at the time he wrote those words he was actually 202 pounds. He put his credibility on line with 25000 people. Ziglar knew that he had to lose 37 pounds before the book was printed. And he did!

Words and emotions
Let’s say that someone has lied to you. You could react by saying that you’re ‘angry’ or ‘upset’. If, however you used the words ‘furious’, ‘livid’ or ‘enraged’ your psychology and your subsequent behavior would be dramatically altered. Your blood pressure would rise or you will feel tensed all over.
On the other, what if you characterized the situation as ‘annoying’ or said that you were ‘peeved’. This might probably make you laugh. You are much more relaxed.
People who make statements like…
I can’t draw!
I am no good at Math!
I can’t remember names!...etc
Whenever you make comments day in and day out, you are programming your mind for failure. It all comes back to your attitude.

How are you?
Our answer to this question seems like a trivial matter. Jeff says that we need to ask our self-such question at least 10 times a day and perhaps as many as 50 times.
The answer to this question can be answered in a negative way, like,” Lousy” or “It’s not my day” or “Thank god it’s Friday”. The answer can be in mediocre way, like, “Not bad” or “Fine”, ‘Hanging’ in there.’
People who use Positive responses like, “Terrific” or “Greeeaat”, or “Excellent” have bounce in their steps and one feels better by being with such people. Such answers energize us. Jeff says that a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

What if I am don’t feel terrific?
There are instances when we are completely fatigued. Half dead. When we return home we refuse to talk to family members. Amidst the fatigue if the family gives a very pleasant news the energy all of a sudden comes from nowhere. We start dancing. The point is that energy can be brought back by attitude control.

Don’t let the complaints rain on your parade.
Jef keller says that the people who always talk about a lack of money generally don’t accumulate much of it.
Avoid saying, “What a lousy, dull day it is!” your brain gets programmed to make it all the more dull and spoils the otherwise better moments that we would’ve had. The reactions like, “I rarely get score of six in the game of Ludo” or “The waiter didn’t come to take over the order”. Life presents too many difficult challenges for us to get bogged down with silly things like these. Self-pity is an acid which eats holes in happiness. William penn says that the secret of happiness is to count your blessings while others are adding up their troubles.
It’s been said that the 90% of the people don’t care about your problems…and the remaining 10% are glad you have them!

Associate with positive people:
A mirror reflects a man’s face, but what he is really like is shown by the kind of friends she/he chooses.
Heard of the axiom, “Tell me who you hang out with and I’ll tell you who you are.”?
There is a lot of wisdom in the simple statement. After listening to toxic talks you feel listless and drained. Motivational speaker Mr. Brown refers to these people as ‘Dream Killers’.

The mind tends to dwell upon whatever is repeated over and over:
If you hear some song a bit frequently it stays in your mind for some time unconsciously even when your find that song silly. Whatever you hear over and again it will be in the forefront of your consciousness.

 Confront your fears to grow
For you to achieve success, you must be willing to be uncomfortable. I am not adept at using Instagram. Confronting it in front of others gives me a feeling of embarrassment. It’s been a year and I am still not better at it. I think the next time I get a person good at it, I shall confront and grow.

Some People are scared of lizards. It is just confronting that is needed to reduce the fear. Often lack of knowledge is the reason for fear. Marie curie said, “Nothing in life is to be feared, it only to be understood”

The price we pay by avoiding the confrontation
 Self-esteem is lowered.
Feel powerless and frustrated.
Tend to sabotage success.
Lead an uneventful and boring life.
Consider yourself an immediate winner when you take the step and do the thing you fear.
He who loses wealth loses much. He who loses a friend loses more; but he who loses courage loses all.

Get out there and fail!
Failure is only the opportunity to more intelligently begin again. Scientists will suggest us the point that it is alright to fail, but experiments need to continue. Reaching your goal or being successful is going from failure to failure without the loss of enthusiasm, said Winston Churchil.
If you aren’t getting the desired success and you are discouraged, ask the following questions
1.       Do I have unrealistic timetable?
You will always be slower than some and faster than some others. Have patience and focus.
2.       Am I truly committed?
3.       Do I have too many discouraging influences?
4.       Am I preparing to succeed?
If the efforts are not accompanied by passion and fun, it needs an introspection.

 Do you want to increase the rate of growth? It’s simple! Double the rate of failure!
Success seems to be the art of hanging around for longer time when most others quit. The greatest mistake a person can make is to be afraid of making one.



Disclaimer:

This is just an attempt to preserve the good points made by Jeff Keller. In the process I have used my experience, discretion to settle on a point.

Vinay Wagh,
Bulls Eye
Nasik